Breathing Again

My fellow readers, I am sorry for the long delay! Life in St. Michael has proved to be very  busy (despite the fact that there is not much to really do here). The last time I wrote was before school even started. Let me do a quick catch up....now that the first quarter is over.

I went through the longest in service in August. The result: a head cold and brain overload. I was exhausted by the end and getting very anxious about school to start. After in-service I felt so overloaded with information that I didn't even know where to begin. My classroom became student ready and I decided on the activities that we would do for the first three days. My energy remained high as I tried to keep up with the bustle of the classroom. At the end of the week I collapsed in my chair and looked around my classroom. Even though my classroom was a mess, I was exhausted, and at a total loss about what to do with my class I quickly loved my class even more. It's nice having a clean classroom with everything put in its place, but it's even better to have a classroom that is lived in. My classroom is my second home here (maybe first). For my students this really is like another home to them. I have a group of students that are my children: my children. I see them all the time, inside and outside of school. Even when they are angry with me, it doesn't last long. The kids here get over things so quickly. After a long day of lecturing students they still run up to me outside and give me big hugs.

In college, we learned to make a list of positive things about students we were frustrated with in order to remind us of the good things about that child. In St. Michael, all it takes to remember the wonderful things about a kid here is seeing them outside of school. They have so much energy, and they can provide so much love. It's so much fun to see them at my window almost everyday. It is a constant reminder that they still love me even when we had a bad day at school. I have a tough group of kids in my class as a whole (they are testing me), but they are all so sweet, smart, and have so much to offer.

St. Michael is becoming more my home everyday. I get along well with the staff and community members. I am learning some of the cultural norms and find myself feeling more like a member of St, Michael. I started going to a church here (Assembly of God), but it's not my style at all. I miss my church in Palmer and McMinnville very much, but it's something that I am trying hard to get used to. My roommate and I are going to start a weekly bible study to help us feel more comfortable in our beliefs. Besides church, I have made a few good friends that I spend my time with. Most of the time we sit and play cards or watch a movie. I have learned cool new card games and am getting very good at strategizing in them (better watch out!). It's weird to get a paycheck once a month and go home after a day of work and not have homework that I have to get done that night.

Now that first quarter has ended, I actually feel like a real teacher. It has taken me so long to really feel like this is real...First quarter was my trial. As second quarter begins I feel that I can wipe my slate clean and start the quarter with more confidence. I am quite relieved that a new beginning is on Monday.

A new quarter means a fresh start: new grades, new methods of teaching, new confidence, new units. It's all there. I just have to grab it and run. It's time to show me as a teacher. As one of my students told me, "You're the best teacher". Now I have to go out there and prove it: to myself and my students.

I will try to write more! As I said: Second quarter is a fresh start!

Caution: "Destruction Zone"

I'm sorry it has taken me so long to write! Let me just say that the past month and a half has been crazy. The end of the summer came faster than I expected and I found myself scrambling to get everything done. Long story short....I'm finally here (without very many options for internet or phone service)! Pippi, my guinea pig, and I hopped on a plane last Friday and landed in St. Michael, AK a few hours later. It was quite relieving to finally make it to my new apartment. Within hours of arriving I was eating dinner with my colleagues and meeting people from the community. There wasn't any time to feel lonely or scared; I had to jump right in. Villagers make you feel so welcome. I couldn't imagine a better welcome. One teacher came to my apartment within the hour that I arrived and gave me a big hug. Let me tell you: that was the best way to start a new chapter.

Like a true nerd I got to see my classroom the very night that I arrived. I became a little kid on Christmas. My eyes scanned the room looking for a place to start. Little did I know that I would soon be overwhelmed with the amount of work I needed to get done. The first day of being in my classroom turned into a day of destruction. I pulled furniture across the room, took books off of shelves, unpacked an art supply drawer, and changed the layout at least three times. By the end of the day I was exhausted and defeated. I was so relieved that my mom was coming in the very next day. Without her I wouldn't have been able to complete everything. I'm pretty sure that I would have fallen to the floor and started crying like a two year old.

I am incredibly lucky to have my mom come and help me set up my first classroom. Simultaneously, I want everyone to know that that was something my mom and I always planned. When I helped her with her classroom at the beginning of every school year, she told me that she would come help me set up my very first classroom. My mom kept her promise. Yes, I'm incredibly lucky.

We spent at least two entire days in my classroom, but I have cupboards that are organized! As I looked around my classroom, I couldn't do anything but smile. In the end, my classroom actually looked like a classroom. With the exception of planning, I was ready to have kids in my class. Real life keeps getting more and more real as the days go by...

The Anticipation is Killing Me

The summer is going by quickly; I thought it would seem like an eternity before I leave for my new home. As the days pass I make lists upon lists of things that I want to get done before August. Amazon Prime has become my best friend as I find my sheets, towels, pillows, and a happy lamp (shipped for free). Shipping my totes is becoming a chore in itself. Every day, I tell myself that I need to ship them out; they are still sitting in my living room.

With each new day I become more anxious. I'm second guessing my ability. My mind feels blank - do I remember how to teach? Really my most challenging hurdle right now is knowing how to start a school year. What do I say? What do I teach? The questions seem never-ending. Luckily, I have been able to create templates so that I only have to put it together when I'm there. I wish I could have everything ready....

In exactly two months I will have twelve little bodies in my very first classroom, and twenty-four eyes staring at me. Twenty-four eyes staring at me: the new teacher-new to the school, new to the village community. The only thing I can even think up to say: "Hi, my name is Miss Rozzi. I am your 4th grade teacher."

Is This Real?

It's getting so close to the end of college. While I'm sad to be saying goodbye, I am ecstatic for the next chapter in my life: teaching 4th grade in Alaska. My dream has finally come true! As I say goodbye, I look back at all of my role models. Those people have formed me into the teacher that I am soon to be. My professors, family, friends, doctors...they have all helped me be here and, now,there.

The past month I have been gaining additional support from other teachers and administrators at my new school. That has truly been a relief! I have received pictures of my classroom and school, I have received numerous e-mails from my principal and other teachers, and I have been given resources to the curriculum. Even though I have already started having my "bad teaching" dreams... my summer is going to be filled with preparation and anticipation. I have attached "before" pictures of my classroom. I can't wait to post the pictures of when I finish setting up my classroom!!